How to Have a Threesome

Based on a short interview, one anonymous female student tells us how she managed her three threesomes, what to do the next morning, and how to deal with the aftermath.

Student X walks amongst all of us, but has likely gone where not many have gone before: into the arms of not one, but two bed partners. She has thus far had three threesomes (♀♂♂ + ♀♂♀ + ♀♂♀). Not all threesomes included penetrative sex. She was open to gay sex before any of these get-togethers, and has had both positive and negative experiences.

She cannot tell us how to organize a threesome: none of these experiences were planned. The first time, a third partner spontaneously joined her and her then-boyfriend. The second time, she was the chosen one, and the last time, both partners agreed on one extra bedmate while under the influence. She mentions that not being sober helps in smoothing the path between the sheets.


Student X lived through all three morning-afters safely. From her experiences, there are three types of mornings: funny, friendly/faraway, and simply f’d-up. She and her partners from the first and second threesome sometimes still mention the occurrence to each other, in a joking way. Her ex kicked his best friend out after the first threesome, saying ‘you can’t go back from these things’ – which all three still laugh about from time to time. The morning after the second time, she was on an airplane back home. However, the third threesome resulted in persisting relationship issues.

For those interested in experimenting, there are certain lessons to keep in mind. Not only did she learn that sex can be more than simple penetration, and that threesomes can lead to amazing and intimate memories, but also that not everyone is made for making love to multiple people at the same time. One wise lesson is to be careful to respect the other’s relationship in case you are the third person: it is a safe bet to stay in touch most with the one that invited you, the initiator, rather than the initiator’s partner. Another is that for successful threesomes, you will need a strong relationship. Her partners from the second threesome are still happily together. But sadly, in regards to her relationship, her current boyfriend is not dealing with the experience as well as she is.

That situation shows the difficulties that can occur when not all three partners are on the same side of the mattress at hand. Her boyfriend feels that she “ruined the experience” because she had a threesome involving penetration before him, whilst he was unable to engage in penetration in their shared threesome (also due to the fact that he was under the influence). Student X and the second girl disagree, saying they wouldn’t have wanted this to happen anyway, and that it was better to start slow. She explains that he feels bad because he was unable to penetrate her friend. When they try and talk about it, “he says I should stop bringing it up and being hurt because it means I accuse him of his pain”. In the end, student X feels these feelings are unjustified, as he was given plenty of attention and satisfaction from two beautiful women during the threesome.

Student X encourages those that are certain of their and their partners’ personal, genuine interest in threesomes to definitely triple the fun at some point. She, for one, “would do it again anytime”. Perhaps not when you are already in a relationship, though (“don’t have relationships, only orgies”). And for the most successful threesomes: “always be the third person and get on a plane the morning after”.

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